Making Beer Suicides

Remember when you were a kid, probably around junior high age, when out to eat at certain restaurants you were given an empty cup an allowed to get your own soda? And at some point the idea took hold to have not just one kind of pop, but ALL OF THEM?

Fast forward some twenty odd years to this past May at the Stillwater Brewers Bazaar. Sometime during the latter half of the festival Jason’s friend Toby decided to go for a grown up version of the soda suicide using all of the Surly beers they were pouring that day. Had this happened at the beginning we would probably have just blown him off, but being that we now had a few beers under our belts, it didn’t seem like a completely crazy idea. And you know what? It was actually pretty damn good!

Skip ahead a couple more months and we decided to have our own in-house beer suicide making evening. Kat & Scott came over, bringing with them some good base beers to compliment the many more aggressive beers we had on hand. Some of our concoctions were great, some “meh” and others were not good (but none so bad that they were poured out).

Hits:
New Glarus Raspberry Tart + Ale Asylum Ambergeddon + Central Waters Glacial Trail IPA = reminiscent of a sour beer
Oskar Blues Old Chub + Lift Bridge Farm Girl + Surly Cynic = very smooth
Lagunitas Hairy Eyeball + Furthermore Oscura
Pearl Street Downtown Brown + Sierra Nevada Torpedo Extra IPA + Central Waters Satin Solstice Imperial Stout +Lift Bridge Farm Girl
Surly Coffee Bender + New Glarus Raspberry Tart + Pearl Street Downtown Brown
Central Waters Glacial Trail IPA + Central Waters Satin Solstice Imperial Stout + Oskar Blues Old Chub = fruity & nutty

Misses:
Surly Cynic + New Glarus Raspberry Tart
Lift Bridge Farm Girl + Surly Coffee Bender + Summit Horizon Red
Founders Dirty Bastard + Surly Bitter Brewer
Central Waters Satin Solstice Imperial Stout + Surly Cynic + Ale Asylum Ambergeddon + New Glarus Raspberry Tart

Beer suicides aren't for everyone, but if you're creative, open minded and use small glasses you just might surprise yourself with some unlikely but tasty creations.

Ten Fidy

Black as night.
Good as hell.
All it was hyped up to be.

Except "hype" isn't right. That would imply the real thing doesn't live up to the buzz. Ten Fidy does.

Aww, Who Broke the Chatterbox?

I used to love the Chatterbox. I mean, aside from your own abode or that of a brother-geek, where can a 30-something man-boy grab a beer and get an old fashioned Nintendo blister while greasy food fumes clog your lungs and weave themselves into your clothes? The Chatterbox is a fantastic bar for gamers and gamer-ilk and those just generally looking for a good time.

So imagine my chagrin when a buddy and I went to the Highland Chatterbox this past Saturday to have a few beers and play a bit of Bo-Jackson-is-forbidden-Tecmo-Bowl and found the place teeming with kids. It was about 7 P.M. and the place was about a quarter full and I figured our chances of scoring a t.v. and some games was pretty good. But no. The place was a quarter full, but all the friggen game stations were being hogged by little kids. Little kids with little orange lips drinking big orange sodas, flashing big, orange-toothed grins and picking orange boogers. And there was a waiting list of more kids waiting for game stations. How annoying...how very annoying. Granted, the Highland Chatterbox is a bit more of a family friendly bar (if there is such a thing as a family friendly bar), but come on. Strike one.

So, our little two-person brain-trust decided to head to the South Minneapolis 'box. Heck, I prefer that one anyway, but figured the Highland one had a better video game selection. As luck would have it, we were able to score one of the two games (the other was being used by...you have it, kids). But alas, they did not have Tecmo Bowl. Hmm, strike two? Nah, I don't think so, but close. But then I went to the bathroom.

The South Mpls Chatterbox used to have damn cool bathrooms. I can't speak for the women's bathroom, having never been in there, but the men's bathroom had very cool cartoon murals. If I remember right, Spidey, the Scooby gang and other cartoon/comic personas had been painted on the dark blue interior of the bathroom. I loved those murals and the fact that someone thought to grace the walls with them and took the time to paint them. But the murals are now gone. In their are those tan plastic walls you often see in bathrooms. I was crushed. That place has lost a lot of character. Strike two.

So, the evening wasn't a total bust. I mean, I did score buffalo nachos at Sally's and 16 Grit and Farm Girl at Sturbs to salvage the evening. But for that, the evening could have been soul-crushing.